I Always Want More
This article has been inspired by the teachings of J. Krishnamurti.
Have you ever reach a goal and once you got it you haven't feel satisfied?
Have you ever been able to have the house, the car, the title, the experience, the knowledge, �, that you want it so much, and the necessity for more property, more titles, better position, more knowledge, or more experiences haven't stop?
Then, you will find this article very interesting.
Krishnamurti says tell us there are many ways the being starts to disintegrate. When the being is integrated, the thoughts, the feelings, and the actions are all ONE. Being disintegrated will be exactly the opposite of that; cut in pieces, separate what was together.
One of this forms of disintegration is the envy, normally named under more beautiful and sophisticated names, like competivity, progress, evolution, development, growth, etc. He calls is disintegration because separates "what is", from what one things he should be.
In his teachings he explains us how the envy starts in a subtle way at a very tender age. Like when we see another child more good looking than us, or who has better things, or better position. You get jealous if another child surpasses you in class, or has wealthier parents, or comes from a distinguish family.
Little by little starts to get form of competition. You want to do something that distinguish you, get better grades; you want to be a better athlete than other, you want to do more, you want to outshine others.
And as we grow older the envy grows more and more strong. The poor envy the rich. The rich envy the richer. There is also the envy of the ones who had have experiences and want more experiences. Or the envy of the writer who wants to write even better, etc.
If we observe this desire to want more, it doesn't matter what, it could be more houses, more clothes, more experiences, etc. It's the simply instinct of acquire more, to accumulate, that seems to have deep roots in most of us. Or if is not that, it could be we want to know more than others, that is why we read much more than others. Or we want to be next to people with high official positions. Or we want to feel we are more spiritual, more evolve than others. Or we want to be more humble, and for this with more virtue, etc, etc, etc.
Haven't you notice this in yourselves, or in the people around you? Our father, or mother wanting more properties, or a bigger name, or the teacher want it to be the professor, and the professor want it to be the principal?- J. Krishnamurti
Krishnamurti explains that is in the desire of acquire more that the universal disease of envy and jealousy disintegrate us. Normally this is unconscious for us. It is very difficult to notice this in one because the mind is the center of the envy.
Observing our thoughts we notice our mind works in comparative terms. I.e.: "I am taller than�" "I am smarter than�" "I am faster than�" "I can explain it better, because I have more knowledge, more intelligence than�". Imaging thinking without this comparative term�.it gets difficult.
In the pursuit of want more, of the acquisition the time is created. For example: "Now I am ugly, but in the future, I will be�" "Now I am poor, but in the future I will be�". This continuous mental comparation makes us chronically unhappy.
Religions universally, and other people from the top of their personal or financial success preach us that we have to practice contentment for what we are or have.
But contentment is not the opposite reaction to the acquisition, or to the envy, is something vaster, more meaningful.
Some people live like this in complete opposition to acquisition, like vegetables, without life cultivating the opposite of what they are. Wanting to not acquire they go to the other extreme, living with a loincloth. But in their desire f no acquire they are cultivating exactly the opposite, also in the field of time, and the envy, because they want to be something.
Contentment doesn't come to you because you decide to be content. Simply happens when you understand who are you, and do not pretend to pursuit what you think you should be.
One thinks he should be happy when you have this or that, even could be nice things, like wanting to be a saint, or a governor. And through the envy we pretend to reach contentment. Contentment is not a satisfaction, is something vital in us. Is the understanding of "what is". Krishnamurti says that if start to understand every moment, each day, and extraordinary sensation of unlimited understanding will take over you.
He explains that if you are greedy, you should try to understand your greed, instead of trying not to be greedy because the desire of not being greedy is a form of envy.
This has been the ideology we have been broad up for hundreds of years. Even the religious institutions preach based on acquisition. They have condition us to think in the terms of "be better" "be more", and in this way they make the envy something desirable. The mind gets limited by the envy, the me, the desire of acquire things, or virtues. The religious mind is not a comparative mind, it is a mind that understand completely the meaning of "what is".
That is why is important for us to analyze ourselves, so we can perceive how our mind works: the motives, the intentions, the desires, the constant pressure of wanting more, that creates the envy, the desire to acquire, and the comparation.
Krishnamurti that when all these desires end through the understanding of "what is", then we will know what is God.
Everyone needs food, clothes, and a shelter. Only an unbalance mind will say: "I don't need food". It's the same as wanting many houses, or any.
The body needs to be feed, because it needs that energy to maintain itself. The problem is when one only want to eat the foods that pleasure his palate. That is where Krishnamurti says the perversion starts.
The problem is not simple, because most of us want other things besides the basic necessities of a little bite of food, clothes, and shelter. We want position, we ant prestige, we want stay closer to God, etc, etc. And the desire of being someone, or being rich, or being a powerful person depends directely on the posesion of things. Krishnamurti teaches us that meanwhile we stay in that state of dependency of things to become internally rich, we will never be internally rich. Simply we are creating the exactly opposite.
In one of Krishnamurti's lectures one of the persons asked him if truth was absolute, or abstract.
He responded analyzing the question. He said that the mind wants absolute things, permanent things, things that the mind can cling on. That is why we say that God is permanent, or that truth is permanent. We want permanent relationships, properties, and virtues. We want things that cannot be destroy, that do not die, and in this way we create permanence.
He explains that the truth is not something mysterious, or far away, it's something you discover day by day. And if it will be possible to accumulate then it wouldn't be truth, because it will hide behind the same spirit of acquisition.
The truth is discovered in every action, in each moment; trivial, or transcendental, listening to others, and to ourselves, although our thoughts can be conditioned, and because of this limited. But the fact of being conscious of this will liberate the mind of the limitation.
�Discover that one is greedy, discover it oneself without anyone telling you, that discovery is truth, and the actions you take upon that will be truth too"- J. Krishnamurti
As you can see the pursuit of acquisition, to posses something permanent is deeply rooted inside each of us, and is only under the introspection of our thoughts and desires that we can wake up from this condition that makes us suffer so much.
I hope this article inspires you as much as has inspired me.
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